Living Out Our Choices

My parents are now in their mid-80's. It is so odd for me to think of my parents nearing the last chapters of their lives. To me, my timeless memories of my dad will always be racing me on horseback up canyon walls that had my stirrups dragging the ground and my face buried in my horses main we were at such a steep angle; him pushing me down so I'd have to get back up to win a sprint across the yard with him; building a backstop so he could teach us how to connect with a baseball; and always telling me "If you're not falling, you're not learning."

My lifelong mom memories are of her nurturing us and our friends - weekend after weekend, feeding us almost every other hour when we'd come in off the lake "starving"; always making sure the fridge was stocked to host the revolving door of lake friends that would come over; and then when my kids were born, having never-ending energy to be the first one up and over at the house checking in on what the plans and needs of that day would bring. Always there, always helping, always supporting.

As mom and dad age, their health needs have increased. Both mom and dad have macular degeneration (a horrible disease that I pray finds a cure soon). Dad's is worse than mom's and he's actually lost about 95% of his eyesight because of it (with the help of a racquetball that I connected into his cornea in the late 80's. Yikes. Guilt Trip. Always wear safety glasses, friends.) I find myself now reaching to dad's hand to guide him to the touch of a paper, a cup, his fork, the handle on a door. This disease was one he had no control over. My dad's in great physical health. He stretches, moves, used to canoe, ride his bike, and most importantly, just stayed moving because he was always doing his own "chores" and never hired anyone to help. Losing vision in your mid-80's is not only physically debilitating to someone that is extremely independent, fit and active, but also mentally and emotionally compromising.

Mom's macular is not as bad, but she struggles with painful hips. She's been diagnosed with "arthritis", but arthritis does not always hurt to the point of disability. Sciatica and limited range of motion due to becoming sedentary can. And I believe that is a bit more of what we are dealing with.

As I went to physical therapy with her last week, I found my "soap box" within minutes of watching her deal with the basic therapist requests. I got hot flashes, my palms were sweaty, I had that awful taste rise into my mouth, my stomach sank. I was dealing with a rush of emotions. So watch out, friends, I'm coming after YOU!

You hear me cite research about mobility and how "the time it takes to get off the ground" has been found to be directly related to how long you will live. Can I tell you I saw that unfold before me during that physical therapy appointment? Even more poignantly, the "amount of time it takes you to roll over from you back to stomach" on a physical therapy table must absolutely, positively be related to mortality!

It was an awful experience to sit in a chair as a witness, watching your 82 year old mother take minutes, not seconds, to struggle, get stuck, work on getting unstuck, have her arm stuck under her body, then her face scrunched, smeared, stuck, then unstuck from the therapy table, as she suffered, winced, pained, moaned, and grunted her way from a supine position to a prone position. And I'm not talking prone, like "on your elbows, supported and ready to plank up." I'm talking "I can't find my right arm that I just rolled over on, nor can I see it because I cannot lift my head as I've slipped into a gravity vortex that I have no strength or mobility to overcome."

Is the picture clear?

I'm not painting it to let you know what a horrible condition my mom is dealing with. That's something we're working on and I love her dearly, so trust me, there's LOTS of working going on. But I share this painful vision with you because, as I step up on my soap box, friends, NEVER allow yourself to slip into such condition while you have the ability to NOT go there!

SOMEONE in your family or support community will be helping you exist one day. PROLONG the day they have to help you physically move your body in basic fundamental motions.

More and more I become tuned into "physical activity" vs exercise. Fundamentally, the human body was designed for physical activity. That was our ancestry of hunters and gatherers. "Exercise" would not even have been fathomable to our hunter and gatherer ancestors. Why the heck would one "exercise" when they'd been chasing antelopes, fishing, gathering herbs, cultivating land, raising cattle, building homes, tending to family needs, and leading communities. There was no time to sit down! "Exercise" was not even a word that existed - and didn't need to! Their lifestyle was one of being physically active to just exist. (This is my dad.)

Then came the invention of the "almighty chair." Then the desk. The car. White collar jobs. Technology. Thus, the "have to" of exercise became a must to keep us moving and mobile. (This is my mom.)

As our 6 For 60 draws to a close, I'm humbled at the awareness and accomplishments made by all. Some nailed all 6 pillars weekly. Some consciously made a choice to nail 2, 3, 4 or 5 pillars. And that was a HUGE win for them! Frankly, just hearing the "ah-ha's" of "THAT'S what they are putting into my "food?!?!" is one of the biggest wins of all for me! Knowledge is power and for you to have the understanding, knowledge, power and control over what someone ELSE is choosing to put in your food is huge! You now have the knowledge to make conscious choices over what you choose to eat.

So beyond the nutrition pillars that you've established, I pray that you'll do everything in your power to be in control of your physical health. Don't let your lack of desire, (soap box, please) your lame excuses, (yes, I called your excuses lame) or your apathy become someone else's problem in the future. When your kids, friends, or significant other has to physically roll you over on a table because of the choices you are making now, that's (I hate to say it, but) self-centered (and friends, rolling 150-200 pounds of "dead, unassisted" weight over is virtually impossible not to mention a very horrible scenario to experience).

My "soap box plea" is that while you are ABLE, do whatever you CAN to remain MOBILE & ACTIVE. You do NOT have to plan a workout. Just Get UP - Get DOWN - and Get Back UP again. You get the picture. You have the tools now. You have the knowledge. You know what to do. MOVE and be MOBILE.

1) Mobility. Stretch, Flex, Move Your Joints, Trigger your fascia
2) Core Strength. Keep it. It does not take long every day, several times a week, to keep a strong core.
3) Strength. Whether you're sitting or standing, lift something repetitively. And if you don't have something to lift, lift YOURSELF. Up/downs in a chair, up/downs on the floor, up/downs jumping up and down. For pete sake, Up/downs and ROLLOVERS on a table!
4) Cardio. Physical Activity. Keep moving. It does not have to be "breathtaking", it just needs to require a bit more "breath" than just sitting.

And here's the kicker - NO ONE - absolutely NO ONE - cares what you do in your spare time right now. But friends, when we all reach those last chapters, anyone and everyone near and dear to you will absolutely care what kind of physical condition and mobility you possess because they will be actively involved in caring for you. Period.

I'm stepping off my soap box now to join you in the commitment to do something EVERY DAY which will improve my quality of life in the last half of my life. I shudder at the day I have to look into the eyes of one of my boys as they reach around me to move my body. I DO NOT want to see into the eyes of their soul them asking, "Why did you let yourself get like this, mom?" I want them to always know I will not become their burden by my own choices but will live to the utmost of my own power until something else takes me down.